I am left with a sense of randomness often times when I am planning these out. I sit down and plan on what I am going to talk about and on the way there the message changes. Lately I have been seeing people sitting in the back of my car, call them spirits, angels, guides, other peoples dead relatives, figments of my imagination, I could careless, the name, the position means less to me than the commentary that takes place in my head.
Often times I hear this conversation, for those of you who wonder about this it is hard to explain. I do not hear different voices, it's my own, but then there are images, sensations, I can even sometimes smell things, it is hard to explain. Anyway, these random things come to me and I end up throwing out the entire original post, the original reading and I realized something. This something is vitally important to me....
THERE IS NO ORIGINAL
These messages are not about me, they are not about healing myself, though at times they do, they are about healing others. When I do something inspirational it often has a two fold purpose, one to remind myself of important life lessons but more so they tend to speak to some people directly.
I often say what I do is automatic writing and/or automatic speaking. Though at times it appears I put a ton of thought into what I say, truth is I just let it flow. My brain purges however it chooses to and often times it purges things just right.
Last Sunday I spoke about looking at what we have and not focusing on what we don't. That we only bring on suffering by concentrating on the past and focusing too steadfast on the future. We forget to enjoy the moments in our life that are good and right. Sure we all have difficulties, who doesn't, but the fact of the matter is we can accept our lessons graciously or whine, pout and stomp our feet like spoiled children. "But I am so connected to God, how could he do this to me." So what level of importance are you placing on yourself that you think God is out to get you exactly?
I started this journey living in a haunted house. Back in the day I didn't have the Ghost Hunters to help me out. The Warrens were out there but there was no Internet to find help. We lived in a house of voices, chairs moving and beds shaking. We lived in a house of people walking up and down the stairs and when I was young I had to make sense of this. When I was eight and attacked by the dog, I nearly died, I had to make sense of what happened to me. Not only did I warn my mother the day I was attacked by the dog that it would happen, due to a dream I had, but I also had to face the fact of touching what many people call Heaven. For being a part of that for just a moment. I lived much of my teen years regretful that I did not die, not understanding the greater purpose I have here. Right here, this is where I belong right now, not just to raise my children but to help others.
I have grown a spiritual garden around me, drawing in like minded people. I don't care if people don't like what I have to say or if they think I am crazy. Truth is this connects with some, things I say are not meant for everyone every day. I trust in the messages being given to me at any given moment.
TRUST
LOVE
FAITH
My church has helped me come to grips with the part of my life I have denied at times. The part of my life that was frightening at times. The part of my life that many of my family members would not understand at times.
I know a lot more then I tell people, I put up walls so as not to be overloaded by other peoples crap. Honestly though, sometimes I stay wide open because the spirits often times offer me the more comfort then some human counter parts.
When I was a teenager I often said that I was an Angel that God forgot about. I realize now that I am still that Angel, I wasn't forgotten, I just forgot how to spread my wings.
Celeste
Information below about my church.
It is a church, like any other church, it has politics BUT there is something beautiful about the people. When the people come together and create something of such beauty and purpose, it is the most gracious, beautiful feeling of love one can experience. That being said, you should come.
http://newingtonspiritualistchurch.org
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