Friday, January 25, 2013
The quick version of my story
It started when I was born:
My mother was told there was no heart beat. They put her under and pulled me out.
I was two months early.
I would not let them keep IV’s in, they had to actually put them in my feet.
I fought to live and lived to fight the good fight.
We lived in a house with spirits, it was subtle thing, voices, foot steps, and then, it got crazier, voices, bugs, demon dogs, but that is for another chapter.
I lived, and fell into a bit of a depression
Wished the Aliens would take me
Wished the Native American drums I heard during the summer was a summons
I just wanted to go home
I awoke one night, from a terrible dream, only it wasn’t a dream and I knew it.
I cried and begged my mother to let me skip my cousin’s Birthday party, I was attacked by a dog in the dream. PLEASE MOM
NO, go, it’s a Pizza Party, no dogs.
Then I go to my cousins
THEN, it happens
I am attacked
I was brought up into a light
I was finally home
The light said, “you have work to do, you have to go back.”
There was no pain despite the amount of damage the dog did, I felt “okay”.
I was brought into the hospital and well, I survived.
When my mother arrived she would cry and apologize. I told her, “It could be worse Mom, I could be dead, why are you crying?”
Then, life went on and the activity got more intense, again, another chapter.
I started reading Tarot at 8 years old to understand what was going on, read up on paranormal, wicca, witch craft, psychics, mediums, and anything I could get my hands on. I was trying to learn but I was very lost.
I felt betrayed by God, by Jesus.
I sat, one night two black stains developed on my ceiling, one that looked like a peddler carrying a sack and next to him a cross, it was Jesus. I yelled at him a lot.
Anyway, I did cards for friends and family, friends of friends.
I stopped, I started, I met other Mediums a few years back, 7 now, they told me I had to let go of the cards, I had to embrace who I was and my purpose.
But I still yell at Jesus,
I still want to get the world to hear the truth
About spreading light and love
I also know the day I go home I will be blessed
But I want to be here a long time, with my kids,
But I spend an awful lot of time over there
In my dreams
I hate it here
The only thing that makes it bearable is the work I do
The peace I bring
The gifts I share
And my children
And the souls I meet that I loved so deeply in past lives
My sisters, my brothers, my mothers, my fathers, my guides, my cousins, my lovers
I love them all just as deeply in this life as I did then
Though they might think that was crazy
They don’t remember
But I do
I remember every single one of them
If I could bring them back to the moments we had
They would remember to
Love each other
You don’t have to like them
Just don’t hate
It hurts too much
I was about 5 or 6, Notice how brown my eyes are, I did a regression once and now I have green and gold in my eyes, I took a piece of me back.