Life is never over until it's over

I always hear people say, "Why me?"
"What have I done to deserve this?"
I don't know, you were ummmmm BORN!

Life is not easy and the meaning of it is whatever the hell you make of it! 

So I figure this, life isn't over until it's over.
We got a say before we got here as to what would happen.  That being said, we don't get to see what lessons we checked off and how much hell we decided to put ourselves through.  Notice the different uses of Hell in one story.  LOL  I am amusing myself today.

Truth is if you keep getting screwed over by people, it's time to pick out some better people.  Oh don't tell me you have because most likely you are picking the same type of friends.  Then you whine and complain that they are assholes and not really there for you. 

I have been the one that has been there for someone who constantly complained about their life and eventually I wasn't the best friend anymore they replaced me because I was nice I guess.  Gosh darn it people, I may be boring but I am a good boring friend to have.

In the end the fact is Life is not OVER until LIFE IS OVER.  WHO wants that?

The point is to live and to perfect being the best person you can be despite the obstacles and shit heads around you.  People are by nature selfish.  They do not do things to you but do things that may somehow benefit them.  Your goal is to move past it with a better sense of self and a kinder nature.  To be sure not to do the same thing. 

Be love, be kindness and be goodness.  Enjoy every hug, kiss, moment of love, laughter in your life.  We don't know when those we love will leave, we don't know when we will leave, but all we can do is remember to be good and kind.

Life is never over until it's over, so embrace each moment like a new moment to shine.

LOVE ME

How does your Garden Grow?

Your BLOG

Today is the day that I stop dying

To please the world

Today is the day that I stop trying

To care for the world

Today is the day that I stop crying

No one ever sees

Today is the day that I stop lying

I start and be me

 

Celeste Lamarre-Vernale

02/23/2015

 

Today this blog is about you, I don't know who you are but I know you are out there.  I know you are tired, and broken.  I know you wait for things to change and feel like you are caged.  I know that you read my blog and say, "I can make changes and get control of my life."  Sometimes you still fall short.  I know you care too much and love too deeply.  I know you are aching and hurting.  I know you need to hear this.  I know, and I have been there.

 

(Oddly this is not about me, not sure who is feeling this way but today is your day my loves.  How does your Garden Grow?)

The State of Human Nature Who SHOULD I Be

Human nature:
What separates from beast?

Not a lot.

I guess I get frustrated when I hear people say things like, "well they should know better." 

Who should no better?  What is it that makes us less primal driven and more focused as a human being. 

I get spoken to a lot about being too loving.  I am too touchy freely and friendly.  I was raised on physical contact.  I would fall asleep in my mothers lap while she stroked my hair.  I was hugged kissed and told how much I was loved.  I would not give up physical contact for any reason ever.  My believe is it is as close to freedom my soul can feel while trapped in this vessel we call the human form. 

I was told that we need to have more decorum, but seriously, pets will lick themselves in public, they don't worry about what people are thinking.  Now I am not recommending public showers or having a free love society, though I see nothing wrong with that.  What I am suggesting is we stop and look at the restrictions we put on ourselves as a human and ask, "Where are these from?"

Marriage
Children
Jobs
Food

Everything we do originates from an idea, concept of what is good and proper.

We should be married and monogamous.
We should have children.
We should have a high paying job.
We should go to college.
We should take care of others.
We should be nice.

FREAKING THROW OUT SHOULD

If you are happy being married great.
If you are happy being monogamous great.
If you have children and love them great.
Do you have to have these things?  NOPE

I have been talking to people in open marriages.  They are happy for the most part.  They allow their partner to understand the more carnal side of their nature and support them in any direction they choose to take.

I have friends who are bisexual, heterosexual, homosexual and not sexual at all.
I have friends who are 30 year old virgins and they seemed almost ashamed to mention they were a virgin and I am like, MORE POWER TO YOU.

The point is we are labeling people and deciding what is best for them.

Instead of asking, "What do you do?  Are you married?"
Maybe we should say, "So what are you doing that makes you happy?"

SO how does your Garden Grow?
What are you doing to make you happy?

Absent for fun

I have been absent for a very good reason.  I have been absent for fun.  I have been busy laughing and traveling to and from Boston.  My goal is to be the funniest Celeste I can be.  That being said, I miss all of you. 

I have no great saying or some new found aha moment that will serve anyone a purpose.  Nothing really, or do I?  I usually do don't I?  Even if it is a bit, how do we say, rambly.

I am writing this not because I want you to read it but because I want me to read this.  Every now and then we get caught up with all that is going on around us.  We become what I call a victim of our own circumstances.  We forget our own goals and dreams, allowing others to dictate our lives for us.

The only person in this world that holds us back from our goals is ourselves.  We have a, "blame the lowest common denominator" society.  "I am not doing well because, xyz and she/he wasn't really doing their share."  Sometimes we have to do our share and everyone elses share too.  Sometimes we HAVE to go it alone to get what we want.  SOMETIMES we have to PUSH and PUSH.  SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO LOOSE A FEW FOLKS TRAILING BEHIND AND NOT BECAUSE WE DON'T LOVE THEM.

I preach a lot about loving our fellow human but there is a difference between loving them and working with them.  Sometimes in order for us to get done what we need to get done we need to politely say, "I am sorry we obviously are not on the same page I am moving ahead on my own."  Or we need to politely decline an offer, "I am sorry I would love to help you but I am afraid I would slow you down."  It's okay to move aside or move on. 

For example Pistol Shrimp my Improv Group, I love those ladies and we had a BLAST.  However, I saw the signs all over the place, different priorities, changes in plans and people moving forward in other directions.  THAT IS OKAY.  They did what they needed to do and that is AWESOME!!!!  I don't think we can all possibly be on the same page at the same time and when it is right, it is right.  At no point did I feel animosity or feel frustrated with them focusing on different goals.  I felt disappointed because I LOVED spending time with the girls but that was it.

I think sometimes we try to play nice in fear of hurting people.  It is the old saying if one door closes another opens.  If we REMEMBER this in life we would have an easier time accepting those closing doors.  I really believe that we need to remember that we are all writing our own books.  If a chapter is done let it go, if someone said they want to be a part of something and they are not that is okay.  Maybe they really wanted to but are not organized, focused, enough.  Who knows the exact reason but don't get angry at them, move forward, find a way to make it work.

I am writing this to REMIND MYSELF that I need to focus better for the sake of all my future plans and focus for the sake of other future plans with friends.  My friend Sharon and I had a big plan we never got off the ground but I shouldn't stop.  So I go back to the drawing board.  I rework my work and I look for a way to bring about change. 

Life is too short to hide in the shadows and pout, stomping our feet when things don't go our way.  Sometimes the best thing we can do is look at our own accountability.  I am unhappy because I can't get done what I want to get done, why?  Is someone slowing you down, change direction, is it something you are doing, make changes. 

Don't just let life happen, you live your life.

So how is your Garden Growing?

Mine has been under about 3 feet of snow for about six months.  ;-) 
Moving forward though, always moving forward whether I like it or not.  SO why not like it, regain control. 

Oh and if you want to come see me, come check out this future endeavor I got off the ground.  It's going to be a great time.

SUNDAY MARCH 15, 2015

At the Curtis House Inn
3:00pm to 5:30 pm and afterwards we meet up and chat.
A gallery with me tea/coffee and snacks
Price is still to be determined and this will be up on their Web page soon.
Price $25.00 a person with limited seats. Come check out the longest running Inn in Connecticut and enjoy your time with me.

http://www.curtishouseinn.com/

Trying to live and trying to be alive, two different things

Lady 1: "Ugh I don't want to hear it, at least your doing something you love?"

Lady 2: "Something I love, are you kidding me. I want to help people but we are understaffed and overworked. I am over this."

Lady 1: "If I didn't have kids I would go back to working in a clothing store as a manager and take my ten thousand dollar pay cut."

$10,000/52 = $192.31 (approx.)

$192.31/40hrs = $4.81 extra an hour

Which will probably end up going back to taxes anyhow.

You are getting paid exactly an extra $4.81 an hour to miss out on time with your kids, be miserable and hate everything you do.

I think about the way society has created this money vortex that we all get sucked into.  College careers are the only way to get ahead, yet there is such an over saturation in most fields that many people can’t get jobs.  Then there is the problem that the government keeps having to give hand outs to people who have to work at grocery store or mall just to support their families because these companies can not shell out an extra $4.81 (according to this persons conversation) and instead they need to make a Multibillion dollar profit for the share holders.

Here is the thing, this isn’t a political rant, this is a reality check. 

STOP

I walk through the stores, streets and various parks daily.  I see people struggling in life.  I keep hearing, what is the point of all this?  What is the point of life?  I think to myself, we are all missing it.  We all get wrapped up in the I have to do this or I need to do that, we no longer see the point.  We are alive to experience life, love, anger, joy, sadness, depression, euphoria, and the list goes on.

What are we really doing?  Where do we find joy in this rat race?  What steps do I take to change this?

1.           Need less (new phones, new cars, new computers, new furniture, new clothes, new shoes)  Stop spending items on needless shit.  We don’t need to compete with everyone.

2.           Remember you are fine.  You are fine being you.  You do not HAVE to bake ten dozen cookies for your kids school fundraiser, buy some and send them in.  You don’t have to be in your friends wedding, who wants to buy a couple hundred dollar dress?  I mean in the end maybe you could wear it again, maybe when we bury you mmmkay. 

3.           Support people who matter.  Support local small business, friends who make shit, people who are trying to eek out a living by doing things they love.  Look into being a better person all around and get away from big box stores.

4.           FIND YOUR SOUL.  People always ask me what it means to have a souls purpose.  We are all geared towards having a purpose.  We all have a desire, maybe someone wants to just ski their entire lives, well become a ski instructor.  Maybe your passion is taking it easy, you don’t want a high stress job so you want to work as a cashier.  You love hair, make up, massage, drawing, doodling, etc.  There is a place for everyone.  If your soul purpose is to be a Doctor or Nurse, the hours won’t annoy you.  The job might but if the job annoys you move to another practice or location.  However, remember everywhere you work there are going to be people you do not connect with.

5.           Find time for you.  You have kids, a family, or maybe family you need to take care of.  I get it.  What I want you to do is find something, an extra curricular activity that you are PASSIONATE about and embrace that.  Do something with that because it makes you a better person in the long run because you are feeding your heart and soul.

6.           DREAM BIG.  Never stop dreaming. 

7.           Don’t count on others.  Just don’t do that, it’s not fair to them to give them a bunch of have to and should do this and need to do that scenarios.  You don’t like the stress of having to do things for others why should you give that to them. 

8.           LOVE!  Spread that shit around like it is candy.  Everyone needs tokens of love.  Now I am not telling you to hug everyone unless you want to get hit or kicked in the groin.  The point is to do little things to let them know they are loved. 

 

Here is where it gets fun, These are ideas on how to improve your life but there are hundreds of different ways based on the individual.  The point is we don’t want to be a live with out living.  We don’t want to exist with out having meaning to the existence.

I once told someone to just try and break free from their own person expectations which were so lofty no one could meet them, not even her.  To let go of her desire to be perfect because we are all imperfect creatures in an imperfect world.  We are not meant to be perfect, we are meant to be human.  Riddled with faults, insecurities and casualties to our heart and mind.  In the end if you want to live, not just be alive but really live, you need to find your inner self and get to the bottom of the greater purpose of you.  What is it that you can bring to this world that will make it a better experience for yourself and those around you that matter most. 

Spread the joy and love of who you are.

Don’t buy into peoples version of who you are supposed to be based on government standards or humanities teachings. 

Love that person inside.

I love you just the way you are.

Love me

Love what you can give to the world

Stop fighting an up hill battle for 481 pennies an hour

 

 

Past Due: STOP Antagonizing spirits

I am going to do something I don't normally do. I am going to let you know how frustrated I am with the "paranormal" field and those "curiosity" fun seekers.

When I do private readings I am working on a higher vibration.

When I walk through houses I am in multiple vibrations and it is tiring, especially the lower vibration.

I do NOT do this for fun, or to make a name for myself.  I am not doing this for some sort of gratification and or reward.  I do this because I care about people.  I could care less if I get a single EVP or shred of evidence.  I know what I see, who I talk to and is normally backed up by research done by myself, the client or teams I work with. 

There is a big difference between a Paranormal team going in to help a client realize they are not crazy and see that they actually have activity to those who put it together because they were just curious and start off in cemeteries, haunted hotels, etc.  A team that goes out to harass spirit and has no respect for the dead are causing trouble big trouble.  They are making hauntings worse and causing a huge increase in negative energy. 

People say what I do is cool but it is freaking taxing on my body and my spirit.  I get a call from someone who has had a team out and they found evidence but only saged the property and said things would be fine.  Really?  Doing sage is to get rid of negative energy and sometimes if not done right (which most don’t know how to do) you end up pissing something off that waits in a dark corner they missed to bother you more.  Maybe they push the energy and taunt it. 

So you think your place is haunted now what:

1.      Rule out the plausible, electrical, plumbing, buy a camera and film yourself at night if you are having frequents sleep terrors.  A lot of the “medical” or physical explanations can be much more easily solved.

2.      Research the History of the Property, the more you know the better you will be able to verify what the Mediums or Investigative teams are saying.  It is good to know and it helps to get rid of the spirit.  Sometimes you need a male Medium, other a medium who works with spirits long term on an energy clearing way and helping them to heal.  Either way it helps you to know or the people you are working with to know more.  If you house has been sold 20 times in 30 years, you might have a problem.

3.      If they are just knocking around or you see them out of the corner of your eye tell them to knock it off.  You would be surprised how effective that is.  Sometimes it may take a few times because just like any annoying person who was only going to be there a few days and are still there a month later, they like hanging with you maybe.

4.      Have a spiritual person or a person of your faith do a house blessing. 

5.      Have someone come sage.

6.      Call a Medium or a Paranormal Investigation Team.  (See rules for that below.)

7.      Ask the Medium questions; see what happened to them to lead them down this path.  Do they have fear?  You don’t want someone who has fear based readings because that means you will most likely hear you have demons.  (Insert eye roll)

What not to do:

1.      Yell!  If you have done the above steps and shit gets real and things start flying.  Feeding that anger, negativity makes it stronger. 

2.      Have a paranormal party with a bunch of friends who think its cool and always wanted to try to catch evidence of a ghost.  So you all get together drinking and trying to do EVPs, use Ouija Boards or other various dumb ideas.

3.      Have a friend convince you that her friends team could come and investigate and clear the place.

How to tell a good team? (If you want proof you are not crazy)

1.      A good team will NOT charge. If you choose to give them a donation towards gas or time that is fine but these people are helping because they WANT to.

2.      A good team does not have children on it.  Rule of thumb no one under 21 hormones are running and their energy is off which can be drained to amplify negative energy.

3.      They have investigated more then just cemeteries and haunted locations in the area that charge for researchers to go in.

4.      They have a group of contacts of a Priest, a Demonologist, Medium, Shaman, and the likes.  They are smart enough to know they can not do it alone.

5.      They do not at any time promise to get rid of all the activity immediately.  A good team will do the investigations, maybe bring in a Medium to see what they are up against and go from there.

6.      A great team will have a 100 question pre investigation questionnaire that will ask about history of mental illness, health issues, medications, drinking or drugs.  Be honest, if you smoke pot a lot that doesn’t mean they are not going to help you or turn you into the police.  They just need to know to rule things out.

7.      LAST BUT NOT LEAST:  INTERVIEW THEM JUST LIKE YOU WOULD A CONTRACTOR.  You have a bad gut feeling don’t use them.  You have a right to ask to talk to all the investigators and ask it they have insurance.  It is expensive to carry but worth it for your peace of mind.

8.      Oh this too, just thought of this, a Million dollars of cutting edge equipment doesn’t mean the people aren’t assholes bringing in negative energy or that they even know what they are doing.

What to avoid when searching for help:

1.      Anyone who promises to remove all spirits sight unseen for money.

2.      Anyone who promises to remove all spirits coming to your home

3.      Basically anyone who makes promises.  I have removed tons of spirits but there are some I won’t bother with or don’t want to try so I hand people over to others.  I tend to work with spirits who are trapped due to psychological conditions, I call it spiritual Therapy. 

4.      NO PSYCHICS, they only predict the future, you need someone that is a Medium or psychic medium but not just some Tarot reader or someone who says I will bring in a board, or pendulum. 

Have faith the problem can be resolved. Listen to the advice entirely, I do not take it lightly when I suggest to someone they need therapy. I am not trying to be a jerk, I am being honest.

There are a few groups in my area I recommend and if they tell you the house isn't haunted it probably isn't. It could be you that has an attachment or it is natural causes. A good team will come out more than once, sometimes three times over a 6 month period. Spirits don't work on command. Keep a log please. 

I am not going to bash anyone on this blog ever but I am going to build up teams I have found to be outstanding in the work they do and their follow through.  The team that I had the pleasure of working with called The Ghost Hunters of Connecticut has a line of people to call in cases of dire straights.  They also have a huge questionnaire and they do their research.  They are constantly trying to help clients even if it is to suggest therapy.  They are honest, they study the paranormal and research and one of the few teams I have met that sages properly.  Chris Baricko and I see eye to eye in regards to almost every aspect of client care, honesty and find it refreshing to work with someone who has done his research and knows his stuff.  He tries to run a tight ship, for me too tight I am no good at meeting dead lines all the time, ha ha.  Most Mediums I know are pretty flighty and lose track of time pretty quickly.  There is a point.

 

 

People:

Stop looking for ghosts because it is fun.  You are actually trapping souls here and some in their death state so that they are tormented.

When you look you are opening yourself up and what you get may not be Grandma Bell with the bonnet in her hair.  It most likely won’t be a poor lost child who you feel compassion for and it attaches to you.  Think before you play these games.

People are making things worse for clients so if you don’t have experience please do a ton of research and work with another team until you learn more.  I understand wanting to help people but make sure it doesn’t end up hurting them with your lack of expertise. 

Get to know the community.  If you are having experiences PLEASE don’t antagonize them or ask questions about their death, if it was painful why would you make them go through it again and again.

If you have a haunted hotel, bed and breakfast or you know someone with one of those establishments don’t make it a ghost hunting haunt to torment the dead.  Really get someone in there to clear it and let them live peacefully.  Please, stop creating more negativity in this world and feeding the bad guys with anger, outbursts and your energy because you are clueless and don’t know how to protect yourselves. 

 

Sincerely,

The concerned Medium

Something that was in my mind so I just wrote it out quick. Wanted to say hello

           I stood beneath the dried flowers,

Half the beauty they once were. 

They hung in the middle of the doorway,

Like some sort of story lore. 

I walked past cracked plaster

And ceilings caving in

I heard children laughing

Parents that would sing

I heard arguing

And angry words

But more than anything

I heard the whispered promise

Of flowers above the door

A story of love

Perhaps lost

Perhaps forgotten

I didn’t know for sure

Walking up the cracked stair case

Water dripping down the walls

Stories flaking from the ceiling

And outdated wall paper tarnished brown

From years of soot and dirt

I made my way to the attic

Quietly I snuck up the stairs

In the corner of the wall

A doll lay naked and bare

The roof let in spots of sun

Made my smile broaden

I knew this house would some day fall

The memories of here would soften

Dreams that were born here

May have died here too

But my mind wandered back to the flowers

Hanging in the door

For just a moment I realized

Every place has had love

Every place has seen anger

Everyone has been loved

Everyone has seen anger

We all need to remember

Every home has a story

Every story has a plot

Every plot has a beginning

Every beginning an end

In the middle is the heart

Of who we are

The stories we have

Embrace them

Love them

And respect all those

Who have walked the streets

The land

Respect all those

Who have come before you

Who will come after

Respect the houses that still stand

The ones that will fall

Those that will be built

For their will be flowers for them all

 

Celeste Lamarre-Vernale

February 17, 2014